how weirdly true those old cliche's can be. I suppose it's in the nature of a cliche to be weirdly true because they are notions that are based on a curious mix of experience and the chinese whisper effect of word of mouth, pushed onto the deaf ears of generation after generation. Yet recently I've been really struck by the phenomenal impact the meaning behind a cliche or wise saying can have.
Earlier this year I went on a date with a guy who liked to talk a lot about self-fulfilment and attitudes towards life. He loved his job and he loved his life and when I expressed my shock at his positive attitude toward EVERYTHING (by nearly choking on my steak no less), he said one thing that I'll admit I kind of rolled my eyes to at the time, but am now considering in a different light.
He said, "have you ever noticed that the things you want most in life are always the things that seem furthest away, and then in some weird round about way, one day you wake up and it's suddenly just happened? No one's there to congratulate you on it. If it's a personal goal no one else even notices. It's a quiet moment on any given day when it just clicks that everything you've worked toward has just come to pass". (No I was not on a date with Jesus, although he was a little bit Tony Robbins-esque - it didn't work out).
He didn't mean it in the sense that it just fell into your lap magically out of the sky (which would be awesome I guess, but then where's the challenge?). He meant that gradually over time we gravitate towards the things we need and the opportunities required to fulfil those roles gradually make their way toward us through this vast social matrix we live in.
Today I walked out of an exam with rather a lot of confidence that I did quite well. As a high school student I was always envious of the kids that were able to ace an exam and have a high grade average because I felt I simply wasn't capable of studying for an exam and doing a good job. Somehow this semester I managed to surround myself with the right influences and people with the right attitudes and together it helped me on the way to not only getting a pretty decent grade for a course I never should have struggled with in the first place, but I am now a giant leap closer to being that student I always knew I could be.
I've always wanted to be better with my money. I've worked part time ever since I was fourteen and I've never had the ability to save any of it or spend it wisely. This semester I managed to get my act together and form a plan of attack that means even if I do get a whopping $500 phone bill, I have a means to rectify the problem. In recent years (although not so much when I was in high school), I've wanted the self-confidence not to take crap from authority figures who don't know me from a bar of soap and think they can screw me over. Somehow, and I don't even know how, I've managed to pick up a knack for negotiating what I want and not settling for second best. I hope this trend continues.
So what's next for me? Who knows. Maybe it will all fall apart tomorrow. Maybe the cliche's won't hold true. Hopefully this gravitation will eventuate in me travelling again sometime in the near future and experiencing the big wide world again. That's all part of the challenge I guess.
Today was one of those random days for me.
Showing posts with label networking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label networking. Show all posts
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Why guys are better than girls (not usually one to go down this road!)
This one goes out to Tim.
Who I've never met but who commented on my blog. "You should write about why guys are better than girls.. he he he.."
I generally consider myself to be a bit of a feminist. I drive my own car, I got my own bling, as the saying goes. That said there are a number of weaknesses to my sex that I'm just going to have to admit to and a number of strengths that men have that I envy.
First of all, men are pack animals. They have this mysterious ability to enter a room full of other men, strike up a conversation about cricket or football, and immediately assimilate into the collective culture of the room. I've got a few guy friends that you could drag to the funeral of a little old lady they never met that I barely knew myself and they'd still manage to escape the situation with a new golfing partner in tow. I haven't wandered out of any parties recently with a new shopping buddy booked for the Myer Winter sale (who weren't gay men). In fact many women if they don't know anyone there hide in a corner and criticise what they are wearing, and just pray for the event to end.
Second of all when men are upset they hide it so much better. They save face so much more easily thanks to their collective testosterone inciting anger (which reinforces the idea of gusto and manliness) rather than sorrow, and the social understanding that men just do not show emotions. They're not filled up with piles and piles of oestrogen that play havoc with their moods and turn them into fumbling sooks at the drop of a hat. In every performance they get first dibs on playing the strong role, the hero, the protector.
Thirdly men just have so much more physical strength than women and that's just plain handy. If you've ever been a single girl with no brothers and tried to move house by yourself you will understand what I mean by this.
Fourthly we're still living in a society where chauvinism still has a seat in the work place hierarchy, and men are still at the top of that food chain. I personally think although the feminine cause is great simple biology means there will never be a true equality. The men get to earn more money because they don't have childbirth interrupting the career flow, and while they do pay out for the wife and kids and other responsibilities, they get to spend any excess on themselves. Women who don't get the opportunity to earn their own money (usually because they conform to the idea of staying home woth the kids) don't get any excess for themslves, and if they do earn their own money via a career they encounter criticism (towards their choice to work over traditional ideas of maternity) and interruptions that make it more difficult for them.
Ultimately there is a choice women have to make about careers and children that men do not have to make by default. This means they will always have the slight upper hand in the general work environment.
Plus their surpreme ability to assimilate to any male group culture means they've got social networking down pat and get the good opportunities while chicks are in the corner wishing they were invisible. In research for this blog idea I stumbled upon this website - http://www.telluswhymensuck.com . A few favourites that various ladies submitted were:
"Because they are insecure...the future is for women. In about 300 years, they will be obsolete and kept alive in pods only for sperm/reproduction purposes. They are inherently useless and down deep are aware of this. This is why society strives so hard to control women-afraid of our inherent power. But don't worry girls, if not in our lifetime, we will nevertheless triumph in the end."
" Men are like dogs. They make a lot of noise. They demand a lot of attentioni. They'll suffer any humiliation for a piece of meat. They have no dignity.... and they stink!"
"Because I always get cheated on or treated like ass. So I just really think that men can go to hell. Every relationship i have ever had, sucked...well....maybe not all of them, because I remember in the first grade, my boyfriend did my homework for me. He was nice. His name was Brian Willing(go figure)."
Not sure I agree completely with these although I love the humour. There ARE nice guys out there and carrying on as though all men are evil is a little bit exaggerated. Still, there are some flaws I would invite my readers to consider:
- men don't put the toilet seat back down again and more often than not don't like to be told. Not just about the toilet seat. About ANYTHING.
- the pack mentality of the average male means they get white line fever and forget to smell the roses along the way
- many men don't like to talk about feelings and have those important conversations where meaning gets across. this is annoying because often meaning is misread, miscommunications ensue, and fights occur where no one knows why one is angry at the other
- the pack mentality of the male makes them really freaking annoying when they're in a room full of their mates.
Yet they feel so good when you cuddle them and any chick that tells you they don't like it when the guy takes on that protector hero role is a big fat liar.
Bottom line (and Sean, if you're reading this, thanks for this one): Men. "can't live with 'em... can't live without 'em "
Who I've never met but who commented on my blog. "You should write about why guys are better than girls.. he he he.."
I generally consider myself to be a bit of a feminist. I drive my own car, I got my own bling, as the saying goes. That said there are a number of weaknesses to my sex that I'm just going to have to admit to and a number of strengths that men have that I envy.
First of all, men are pack animals. They have this mysterious ability to enter a room full of other men, strike up a conversation about cricket or football, and immediately assimilate into the collective culture of the room. I've got a few guy friends that you could drag to the funeral of a little old lady they never met that I barely knew myself and they'd still manage to escape the situation with a new golfing partner in tow. I haven't wandered out of any parties recently with a new shopping buddy booked for the Myer Winter sale (who weren't gay men). In fact many women if they don't know anyone there hide in a corner and criticise what they are wearing, and just pray for the event to end.
Second of all when men are upset they hide it so much better. They save face so much more easily thanks to their collective testosterone inciting anger (which reinforces the idea of gusto and manliness) rather than sorrow, and the social understanding that men just do not show emotions. They're not filled up with piles and piles of oestrogen that play havoc with their moods and turn them into fumbling sooks at the drop of a hat. In every performance they get first dibs on playing the strong role, the hero, the protector.
Thirdly men just have so much more physical strength than women and that's just plain handy. If you've ever been a single girl with no brothers and tried to move house by yourself you will understand what I mean by this.
Fourthly we're still living in a society where chauvinism still has a seat in the work place hierarchy, and men are still at the top of that food chain. I personally think although the feminine cause is great simple biology means there will never be a true equality. The men get to earn more money because they don't have childbirth interrupting the career flow, and while they do pay out for the wife and kids and other responsibilities, they get to spend any excess on themselves. Women who don't get the opportunity to earn their own money (usually because they conform to the idea of staying home woth the kids) don't get any excess for themslves, and if they do earn their own money via a career they encounter criticism (towards their choice to work over traditional ideas of maternity) and interruptions that make it more difficult for them.
Ultimately there is a choice women have to make about careers and children that men do not have to make by default. This means they will always have the slight upper hand in the general work environment.
Plus their surpreme ability to assimilate to any male group culture means they've got social networking down pat and get the good opportunities while chicks are in the corner wishing they were invisible. In research for this blog idea I stumbled upon this website - http://www.telluswhymensuck.com . A few favourites that various ladies submitted were:
"Because they are insecure...the future is for women. In about 300 years, they will be obsolete and kept alive in pods only for sperm/reproduction purposes. They are inherently useless and down deep are aware of this. This is why society strives so hard to control women-afraid of our inherent power. But don't worry girls, if not in our lifetime, we will nevertheless triumph in the end."
" Men are like dogs. They make a lot of noise. They demand a lot of attentioni. They'll suffer any humiliation for a piece of meat. They have no dignity.... and they stink!"
"Because I always get cheated on or treated like ass. So I just really think that men can go to hell. Every relationship i have ever had, sucked...well....maybe not all of them, because I remember in the first grade, my boyfriend did my homework for me. He was nice. His name was Brian Willing(go figure)."
Not sure I agree completely with these although I love the humour. There ARE nice guys out there and carrying on as though all men are evil is a little bit exaggerated. Still, there are some flaws I would invite my readers to consider:
- men don't put the toilet seat back down again and more often than not don't like to be told. Not just about the toilet seat. About ANYTHING.
- the pack mentality of the average male means they get white line fever and forget to smell the roses along the way
- many men don't like to talk about feelings and have those important conversations where meaning gets across. this is annoying because often meaning is misread, miscommunications ensue, and fights occur where no one knows why one is angry at the other
- the pack mentality of the male makes them really freaking annoying when they're in a room full of their mates.
Yet they feel so good when you cuddle them and any chick that tells you they don't like it when the guy takes on that protector hero role is a big fat liar.
Bottom line (and Sean, if you're reading this, thanks for this one): Men. "can't live with 'em... can't live without 'em "
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